In honor of our voting partners in the UK here are the 6 worse UK entries, according to The Guardian that is, and for the large part they are right

James Fox: Hold On To Our Love (2004)

29 points, 16th place

In the Noughties, the UK’s Eurovision committee found an exciting and plentiful new dearth of talent in the world of the reality pop show loser. Pop Idol’s Jessica Garlick came third for the UK in 2003 while Popstars: The Rivals runner-up Javine Hylton was chosen to represent the country in 2005. The X Factor binman Andy Abraham gave it a go in 2008 and by 2009 the whole process came to a natural head when the BBC’s Eurovision team created their own reality show called Your Country Needs You. In the middle of all this was 2004′s entry from James Fox, the hapless former Fame Academy entrant whose supremely lame tune was outstripped in the uselessness stakes only by his curious choice of powder-blue suit, a costume choice which sadly conjured an image not of planet-conquering pop icon but mid-1950s toothpaste mascot.

Jemini: Cry Baby (2003)

0 points, last place

Shout what you like about Eurovision voters getting it wrong but in 2003 it was hard to argue with the logic when Jemini – a second-rate H & Claire and therefore a third-rate Dollar – came home with zero points. This was the UK’s worst result in the contest’s history. The duo blamed the result on not being able to hear their vocals through the on-stage monitors but this was a somewhat optimistic way of explaining away the disastrous result, and you have to question whether the monitors did somehow become sentient during the performance, travelled back in time and wrote the steaming Euroturd Cry Baby. Being realistic, the blame can be placed less on the monitors and more on the shoulders of songwriter Martin Isherwood.

Kenneth McKellar: A Man Without Love (1966)

8 points, 9th place

Performed by what appeared to be a bank manager in what was definitely a kilt, A Man Without Love began with the somewhat nihilistic claim that “a man without love is only half a man, and half a man is nothing” and in 1966 plunged viewers further into despair over the course of what still feels like a very long three minutes. The YouTube clip is notable for the slightly awkward “I think we got away with it”-style footstamp as Ken hits the final note.

Live Report: Why Do I Always Get It Wrong? (1989)

130 points, 2nd place

In a parallel universe, a parallel version of Magic FM still plays Live Report’s Why Do I Always Get It Wrong? at least twice a day. Fortunately we live in this universe, where I Want To Know What Love Is fills the Magic slot and Live Report’s overwrought plodathon is largely forgotten. It did well for the UK 21 years ago but with the benefit of hindsight this is mainly due to their keyboardist’s distinctive “blind Shania Twain” get-up.

Black Lace: Mary Ann (1979)

73 points, 7th place

This heinous pop act – sung by a man seemingly styled on Suzi Quatro – launched the career of a band later responsible for 80s anthems such as Superman and Agadoo. Black Lace would really hit their creative peak with Gangbang, as featured on Rita, Sue And Bob Too and more recently repopularised by 68-year-old X Factor contestant Betty Bryce. Bryce would, in fact, be a better UK 2010 entrant than most of the acts lined up for tonight’s show.

Nicki French: Don’t Play That Song Again (2000)

28 points, 16th place

In 1995 Nicki French, a UK “chanteuse” whose delicate tones bring to mind a crow being beaten to death with a foghorn, stormed the UK charts with what is now rightly regarded as the definitive version of Total Eclipse Of The Heart. Half a decade later she was firmly in the “annual three-song PA at your local homosexual nitespot” territory so who better to take their country to victory when Sweden hosted the 2000 Eurovision song contest? Denmark’s The Olsen Brothers, as it turned out, with Nicki French scoring only 28 points with what, we can now acknowledge, was not exactly a song one might easily describe as “world class”. This YouTube clip is perhaps the best representation of Don’t Play That Song Again – it features Nicki, back in Sweden eight years later, at Stockholm’s EuroPride 2008.

He has scrapped his upcoming Eurovision movie, thanks be to god. This would have been worse than Bruno and that was just utter rubbish.

While not normally the not reliable of news sources The Sun have the article.

SACHA BARON COHEN has scrapped his new film about the Eurovision Song Contest, The Sun can reveal.

The Bruno star, 38, had been working on the movie with screen-writing partner DAN MAZER since finishing the fashion industry satire last year.

Studio Working Title had given the green light to the spoof about a desperate pop star entering the singing contest.

A source said: “Sacha and Dan have been feverishly working on the film for a long time now.

“They’d completed a lot of preparatory work and had a team assisting them, but they’ve axed the idea.

“They felt that it wasn’t working.”

The Russian wildcard that has withdrawn, written by Phillip Kirkirov. It’s actually very good, bear in mind it’s a demo so lots of nah,nah,nahs. But a couple of key changes and a catchy tune, I’d love to hear the proper version of this.

Here is a sample of the latest Industry song – Kill the DJ.

I like it, I like it a lot.

Industry have recently been confirmed to support JLS on their upcoming Irish Arena Tour live in Dublin and Belfast.

You can view their official website here

Ever wanted to write a song for the Eurovision but thought where do I begin?  Well as Julie Andrews sang it on the hilltops of Austria, ‘Let’s start at the very beginning’.

First decide on what kind of song you want to represent your country.  These usually can be broken down into…

High Energy dance hits with artist wearing as little as possible, flesh is apparently the new pink.

Slow sumptuous ballads/duets with overflowing ball gowns and a wind machine set to maximum.

Traditional folk ditty’s that remind us all of an ancient culture we no longer possess or would want to go back to, hygiene was usually an issue, yet have to pretend to remember fondly.

Gimmick songs for anyone who wants to take a leap of faith that yes rocking monsters, a talking turkey or a grown woman dressed like a doll could actually win.  What were their songs again?

The Message song, ah where would we be without it, want to sing about your pain, think we’ll care, if you do then the Eurovision stage is for you!

Finally ‘Be from Ireland’ now that its judge voting we once again stand a chance against political voting and neighbouring good will. 

Next look at previous winners of the type of genre and try to copy it although that’s not always a success when it’s blatantly obvious.  ‘Waterloo’ won the 1974 Eurovision contest for ‘Abba’ and Sweden.  ‘Take me to your heaven’ decribed often as an Abba style song won the 1999 Eurovision for Charlotte Nielsen yet poor Sandra Oxenryd representing Estonia in 2006 didn’t even reach the final with her heavily laced Abba influenced song, ‘Through my window’.  Play all three one after each other and you’ll be like ‘Woah’.  Still catchy hero worship often gets the Douze points and as the adage states, ‘If it’s not broke, then don’t fix it.’

Originality depending on the mood of the night can sway either way so always remember to try and connect with your audience.  Don’t be soppy for soppy sake, if you are going to write a love song give it a happy ending, remember the target audience, euro-boppers are frivolous, fun loving people, pain and angst could dampen the mood and be social suicide. 

You are not writing a song to be a worldwide number one, would be great if it happened but the Eurovision is almost a genre in its own right and while in most cases familiarity breeds contempt the Eurovision is comfortable in its own skin so be aware of the body.

I once wrote a song intended for the Eurovision stage entitled ‘Camp it up Candy’, needless to say I’d imagine Dustin would have done better.

Writing a song for the Eurovision is no easy task but it could launch your name on a European stage so choose your category and take a pen in hand and remember another song from the Austrian hills, ‘Climb every mountain, forge every stream…….till you find your dream.”

Now I’m been soppy for soppy sake, oops.

EuroSong finalist and 1993 Eurovision Winner Niamh Kavanagh will give the first public performance of her new song ‘It’s For You’ at ‘EuroBash 2010 Dublin’

Book your tickets now call + 353 (0)87 256 9584 or E-mail eurobash@gmail.com Tickets also from OGAE IRELAND call + 353 (0)87 686 1857

Been a bit busy lately, but that’s changing

So over the next few days we’ll be doing a review of Saturdays MF plus the next semi preview. What does Malta have in store for us? As well as Armenia and Moldova. Also about the utter insanity and utter coolness of Dolph Lundgrun.

In the meantime I’ll leave ye with this piece of gold!

Plus as an added extra the new look to the site might just be revealed

Carola has recorded a charity single, written by Natasha Bedingfield, for Haiti. She’s also organizing a charity concert for the same course in Filadelfia church in Stockholm on February 25. Charlotte Perrelli, LaGaylia Frazier and Kristin Kaspersen are the first other artists included to the set and Carola wished to do a duet with Charlotte or Lena Philipsson as well.

Carola has been doing charity for Haiti already for many years and has even a godchild, 14 year old Edens Dorelus living outside Port-au-Prince. Just a couple of days ago she found out he is ok. Carola is off to Haiti for a visit on February 1

Thanks to Ilkar for this.